Casting On New Projects (AKA Avoiding Finals)

Ever since my relationship of eight years ended two weeks ago, I've been spinning my wheels.

The plan was to be done with my freelance project before finals week, but I spent a week just numb and recovering from the shock of the finality of it all.

I reorganized my yarn stash on Saturday and realized I really have a lot of yarn. I need to start making more projects with the patterns I planned for them using yarn I've already bought.

So, I cast on a Firefly Dishcloth last night. It's small enough that I can knit a row or two when I need to think, but it's interesting enough to be a bit of a challenge. I'll finish it up this week and add the yardage to Stash Dash 2015.

I'm itching to cast on a Liason Tee and a Flax sweater. I've got yarn earmarked for both projects. Knitting is so much more fun than doing final portfolios or freelance projects. I'm sure if knitting were my job, I'd have a spotless house ...

The good news is I've found a new apartment. It's super cute, even though there's only street parking and no dishwasher or laundry facilities. But, the price is something I can afford and I can get a six-month lease. Even if some of the job prospects work out sooner rather than later, I can afford to pay for the full term of the lease in order to be able to walk away.

I bought dishes today. They aren't exactly what I wanted, but they're cute - white with blue stripes. I gave away my awesome Coca-Cola set in Georgia because "we don't need two sets of dishes."

Now I'm no longer a we and until today, I didn't have dishes. It's weird to think of myself in only terms of "I" and no longer "we." These dishes are always going to be the set I bought to replace the Coca-Cola plates I loved because "we" didn't need two sets of dishes.

I've got two classes with finals next week. I have a portfolio due Wednesday and a portfolio due Thursday. I also have a three-page essay to write for one of the portfolios. And the freelance project is not done yet. Which is stressful.

But, I have a plan. I have a tentative move-in date. I'm getting ready to move forward.

I'm going to focus on making my new place a home, even if it's only for a few weeks or months. I'm still hopeful something else will stick, even though I'm heartbroken I didn't make it to an in-person interview for the job in Portland. Maybe something else will turn up. Maybe I'm trapped in this city for the rest of my life, working a job that fits like a shoe that leaves blisters.

I just have to stop searching for the ring

Earlier this week, my engagement ended. More than five years of being engaged. More than eight years in a relationship. Over.

I'm sad. The hardest part is that I developed a habit of using my left thumb to make sure the ring was still on my finger. I was so worried when I first started wearing it that I would lose it; I'd flick my thumb across it to make sure it hadn't slipped off. For more than five years, that's how I reminded myself if I had put it on after my shower or after cooking.

I also fiddled with it when standing around, pulling it on and off my ring finger with my right hand. I find my right hand slipping over the left, and not finding it there.

That's when I know it's over. When I search for the ring and I don't find it.

It hasn't really sunk in; I'm looking for a new apartment. I'm looking for ways to move forward with my life.

He's leaving the house tomorrow for three weeks. While he's up visiting relatives, he's going to have our terminally ill dog euthanized. She's really deteriorated and it's the right decision.

Even in the midst of all of this, I just have to stop searching for the ring.

Oopsies!

For the first time since I started this blog, I missed my Sunday post.

I've been working on freelance, paid work and I've been dealing with major life changes.

I can't share everything online just yet, but I wanted you all to know ... winds of change are coming.

Summer Session I Starts Tomorrow!

Tomorrow is when the first summer session begins. I'll be taking two classes, which should keep me fairly busy because the summer session takes place over five weeks rather than 16.

I've already filled out my planner with the first week of summer session's to-do list. It's not as bad as it looks, and writing it down helps keep me on track.

For one class, we'll be reading Second Nature by Jack Collom. I'm not sure it's my cup of tea, but we'll see.

So far, I'm really nailing the schoolwork, so I'm hopeful doing four classes over the summer won't overwhelm me, even though I know I'm moving in a few months.

In other news, I sat down and reworked one of the short stories I wrote for my advanced fiction class last semester and submitted it to an appropriate journal. The journal boasts a two to three day turnaround, which I'll believe when I see. I'm hoping to start publishing more aggressively, especially in the field of fiction since I am leaning toward doing an MFA thesis in fiction.

I'm also working on a top-secret project I can't really talk about right now (hint: it involves a city I love very much). I'm super excited about the word I received today and probably will stay up a little later than usual to finish it up.

I also will work on the index of a book. This is the second major publishing gig in a year I've gotten from my network on Twitter. The pay is fair as well, which is even better. I can't stress enough how wonderful Twitter is for networking once you find the right people to follow and listen to.

My hashtag #altactips is doing fairly well. So far, I'm the main voice in the hashtag, but I do look out for new content and have noticed an uptick in my impressions. I'm averaging more than 100 for most #altactips tweets, which isn't bad considering I'm a relatively small potatoes Twitter user.

Let's hope things stay positive and the secret project turns out to be something I can share here!